AIM: Through Thick and Thin

This month we are tackling the topic of regaining weight after a large weight loss–IS IT INEVITABLE??? Well, if you look at the statistics, I guess it is. “They” say that 95% of the people who lose weight will regain all the weight they lost. But that’s not really what we’re talking about.  At least its not what I want to talk about.

I want to talk specifically about me. Isn’t that what this blog is all about? I want to talk about people who’ve lost a large amount of weight–let’s say one hundred pounds,– and then bounce back up 10-20-or 30 pounds. Is that inevitable? Is it the norm? Short answer: I don’t know. I’ve never read anything directly addressing that issue. But I do know what I have witnessed. And I know my own experience.

Eight years ago I weighed 255 pounds.

Two years later, I had lost 100 pounds.

(In 2009, at 155 pounds.)

 I maintained it for a while, and then over a period of about 3 years I gained back 25 pounds. Was that because life was extra stressful during those 3 years? (It was.) Was it because I ate too much? (Umm, yeah. Obviously I ate too much to maintain that weight loss.) Or was it because my body was struggling to “return to normal”?

• My life was super stressful for those three years. I can see it better now than I did when I was in the midst of it. I don’t remember thinking specifically “Oh I can’t stand the stress. I’m going to eat whatever I want.” And the truth is, stress is just part of life. It will always be with us. It was during this time that I worked through a book on emotional eating and discovered that I ate in response to anxiety.Who knew? 
• Obviously I ate too much. But I didn’t routinely overeat. I didn’t binge. I actually was learning that whole time about eating healthier whole foods. I explored paleo, raw, vegetarian, and even vegan diets. They all have benefits–and some really great-tasting recipes! ( I don’t follow any of those specific diets.) During this time I also explored the thought processes of Mindful Eating and HAES (Health at every size.) I don’t think that these two lines of thought were particularly helpful to me.
• I do think that there is a huge component of your body wanting to return to homeostasis (its own version of normal.) This is not a popular view, because it means we are not exactly in complete control of what is happening to us.

Right now, here’s what I think happened to me. I lost 100 pounds. That did not even get me close to a “normal BMI” (a number I don’t pay attention to any more.) Still, it was a 40 percent reduction in what my body had come to consider normal. My life was stressful, and even though I had been maintaining a weight loss for several years, I had not truly addressed the emotional component of it. I consider this to be one of the most helpful aspects of my journey. And I believe that there was a component of my body fighting for homeostasis. That large of a weight loss was perceived as abnormal by my body. That is why there is a lot of talk about POW’s (Previously Over Weight) having to be super-vigilant about what they eat. It ISN’T the same for us. During the time I regained the 25 pounds, there were also numerous attempts to lose the weight. Obviously none were ultimately successful.

(Last November, at 180 pounds. Notice the skillful camouflage LOL.)

I am hopeful that now my body has accepted this “new” weight as normal (after six years!) and that that is why I am currently having more success at continual weight loss than I have  in the past three years. Does that make any sense? So if I am “successful” and make it to my new low goal of 140 pounds (a 22 percent reduction in my weight,) and I am correct in my assumptions, I can also be sure that my body will fight that loss as well, and that I might have a little rebound weight.

And so it goes…

To read more about “through thick and thin,” be sure to check out my friends and maintaining experts:

Lynn @ Lynn’s Weigh

Lori @ Finding Radiance

Shelley @ My Journey to Fit

Cammy @ The Tippy Toe Diet

AIM: Adventures in Maintenance is Lynn, Lori, Debby, Shelley, and Cammy, former weight-loss bloggers who now write about life in maintenance. We formed AIM to work together to turn up the volume on the issues facing people in weight maintenance. We publish a post on the same topic on the first Monday of each month. Let us know if there is a topic you’d like us to address!

 

Hope in Uncertain Times

One day in December I stopped at the local gas station to fill the tank because I was going out that evening. It was the day of our annual church Christmas dinner. When I went inside to pay, the clerk was watching a little TV. I couldn’t help but hear what was being talked about, and I asked “did that just happen?” (Not having television myself, I never quite know if I am current on the latest news.) She said yes, and its only going to get worse (I think she was referring to that Mayan calendar thing.) It was news of the horrible elementary school shooting in Connecticut. I got back in my car and cried.

That night I went on to church for our Christmas dinner. Because that’s what we do in America. We say our lives will be changed forever. But the next day we go out for lunch with our friends.

Our church dinner is always a very pretty affair. Each table is hosted by a different woman, and she decorates the table using her best dishes and Christmas decorations. Honestly, it kind of irritates me. But that is a story for another time. At some point during the dinner I looked around the room and thought, it could happen here. This is exactly the kind of unexpected place where this kind of unexpected horror could take place. Uncertain times.

And it just continued on from there. A blogger died unexpectedly. A friend’s husband got cancer and was gone in four months. The Boston Marathon. West, TX. Uncertain times.

Brene Brown spoke about the collective fear she sees in our culture since 9/11 hit.

Anne Lamott wrote about her trip to Europe. A friend advised her that she needed to see a concentration camp in person “to get at a cellular level the fact that despite our great love and art, we are a violent species. Cain is still killing Abel.” There was a beginning, but there is no end to evil in our world.

When we are honest and true, we know deep down that all of life is uncertain. We just relate more to certain events. “It could have been my child.” “I am a runner.” “I am a blogger.” “My brother lives in west Texas…” And the biggest fear “It could have been me.”

As always, I turn to my God for answers. I’m afraid there are many things that won’t be answered clearly in this lifetime. I don’t pretend to understand why these things happen. I won’t try to give you trite answers, or to tie everything up in a neat little theological package with a pretty little bow on top.  But I was comforted by the words I found in the Psalms. For me, this is the only way I can live. I hope in my God. He is my Rock and my fortress.

I run to Him in uncertain times. And I find hope.

(You can see more of the quilt on my quilt blog.)

A Little Chat about Weight Loss and Clothes

As you know, I’ve been losing a little weight. I have a range of clothing sizes in my closet. One day I was wearing my “these are just a little too big” pants around the house, and I changed into my “these are just a wee bit snug” jeans before I went out to a meeting. Honestly, I felt a little schizophrenic that day. Because when I am wearing the loose ones, I feel good. I recognize that I have lost weight, and I feel ‘thin’ for a little while. When I am wearing the tight ones, yes, it is nice that I can fit in those again, but I feel ’fat.’

I think there’s a place for both types of clothes during weight loss. I hear some bloggers say that they will only wear their super tight clothes as a constant reminder that they need to lose weight. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wearing my loose clothes and enjoying the fruits of my labor. Its pleasurable to be able to feel the weight loss in this way.

On the other hand, I also hear bloggers saying they are not going to buy any new clothes until they reach X weight, or even goal. They sometimes complain that their clothes are practically falling off of them. That’s not right! Its unnecessary. Right or wrong, in this country, where we buy way more than we need, there are always practically new clothes available in the thrift store in almost every size. I am not even a good “thrifter.” I am impatient and get bored easily. But I can usually breeze through a thrift store and find an item of clothing or two that fits my new size (bigger or smaller :} )

Wearing clothing that is way too large or way too small is not self-respecting. And self-respect is something I hear a lot of women seeking to lose weight say they lack. Wearing clothes that fit and make you feel good about yourself is a simple and cheap way to start working on that.

P.S. Important recipe information! When you try a new recipe its always good to run it through the calorie counter yourself. Especially when it seems too good to be true. I routinely do that. So imagine my distress when I double checked the calories on the two recipes I recently shared (the Shut Up Brownies and the Banana Muffins) and then I got my bag of oat bran out of the freezer and noticed that stats on it were significantly different than what calorie count (and my little calorie book) give oat bran. It changed the calories in the brownies from 80 to 110, which is still a good deal IMO. So just double check the calories in your oat bran if you are planning to try these recipes. The oat bran I actually had was 390 calories per cup. The oat bran I used in the calorie counter was only 240 calories per cup.

Adventures in Maintenance!

During weight loss, we’re rock stars. The scale goes down and people notice. But when the scale stops moving and the compliments wane, we’re more like the roadies, the people who work long after the music stops and the fans go home. No one pays us much attention, but we’re imperative to the success of our former rock star selves.

Adventures in Maintenance (AIM) is Shelley, Lori, Cammy, Debby and Lynn, former rock star weight-loss bloggers who now write as roadies of weight maintenance. Collectively, we have lost 528 pounds and have been maintaining for 24.5 years. We formed AIM because we know what it’s like to take aim at maintenance. The perfect shot is really hard, but you can get close with practice.

As bloggers, we want to work together to turn up the volume on the issues facing people in weight maintenance. Although we will continue to write independently, on the first Monday of each month, we will post a blog on the same topic.

One subject, five voices. And you, our readers. There’s a larger conversation to be had about weight maintenance, so we encourage you to add your voice. Let us know what topics you’d like us to address, and when you read our posts, add your comments. Together, we can dispel myths, encourage each other, and take a blogger’s AIM at the heart of maintenance. Look for our first AIM post on Monday, March 4 and the topic is: “What’s Different This Time.”

Allow us to introduce ourselves:

Shelley

For those of you new to my blog, My Journey To Fit, I’m Shelley and I’m a mom to two grown sons, Sam and Max, and wife to Jeff. We’ve been married for nearly 29 years.

I’ll be turning 50 in a few months, and quite honestly, I’m pretty dang excited about that…losing my excess weight has allowed me to BE and DO so many things that I never thought would be “me.” And while I don’t know what is in store, I’m happy to be physically able to take on whatever catches my fancy (and yes, I realize I sounded like a 90-year-old with that phrase).

My blog has evolved over the years, starting with my diet adventure and grudging acceptance of exercise, to the discovery that I liked running (I was the one who said I’d never run…lesson learned, never say never!), along with shopping for clothes (so much more fun now that I’m not relegated to the plus-size department), and my hobbies – I learned to knit last year and have been torturing treating my readers with updates and pictures of my knitting projects. Who knows what’s next?!

Why am I participating in AIM? Well, I stumbled onto a couple of maintenance bloggers – coincidentally, one was Lynn – before I lost my first pound. What struck me right away was that not only had these women, who were as big as me, lost weight, but they were keeping it off. Bingo – that made me realize that this time, if I truly wanted this to be my last diet, I was going to have to do things differently so that I didn’t regain the weight like I did every other time I dieted. Making changes with the idea that they were going to be on a permanent basis, instead of temporary cutbacks, was the key to my success. While I haven’t kept off every single pound I lost, I’ve managed to keep nearly all of them at bay, and I’ve finally realized that I don’t have to eat my way through life to be happy.

Lori
My name is Lori and I write the blog Finding Radiance. I chose that name because that ended up being what I was striving for. Not a specific goal weight or size, but being happy within.

I had struggled with my weight for most of my life. Lost and gained several people throughout my adult years. LOL! I have done many weight-loss programs and most were successful to a degree, but something was missing since I kept putting the weight back on. That something was really learning to love myself and develop a better relationship with food. Also important was discovering exercises that I love. I turned into quite a biker and love strength training!

My blog talks a lot about food because – quite frankly – I love food. The biggest thing for me was learning to let go of guilt about food or feeling like I only had to eat carrots and cottage cheese in order to lose/maintain my weight.

You also will see a lot of the general things in my life. I often post about whatever is in my head, my latest home improvement projects, and my cat (she is very popular) because as a maintainer, life is more than just the scale – and that is how it should be. I do struggle with maintenance at times, but it really never is a perfect road.

I was thrilled to be asked to be a part of AIM because of the deep respect and admiration I have for these wonderful women. There is definitely a hole in the weight maintenance world. It’s like once you lose weight, you disappear from the blog world. Kind of like the Bermuda Triangle for weight-loss bloggers. That needs to change because there is a ton of support for when you are losing, but not much when you are maintaining, and not much is written about what to expect or how to handle some regain or when you start having body acceptance issues. (What? You mean I won’t look like a supermodel once I lose weight??). I look forward to where this journey takes us!

Cammy

I’m Cammy, of The Tippy Toe Diet. I started out trying to lose weight at the “chubby” level and eventually dieted myself to the edge of morbid obesity. I spent years (and years!) cycling through one diet plan after another, but I could never maintain any of them for the long term. The repeated failures battered my self-esteem and part of me wanted to just give it all up, but thankfully, some little spark of hope remained.

In 2007, I adopted a different approach. Instead of trying to follow other people’s diets to achieve other people’s ideals, I spent some time thinking about what comprised my ideal. In doing so, I realized that I didn’t really care about being thin or skinny or any of the other media-defined measures of success. What I really wanted was be healthier, more vibrant, and yes, a smaller size. More importantly, I wanted to do it in a way that I could sustain for the rest of my life. And, by golly, I wanted it to be FUN!

Recognizing that the completely-overhaul-your-entire-life-starting-this-Monday approach had never worked for me in the past, I implemented changes in my lifestyle slowly, sometimes in teeny little steps. My blog, The Tippy Toe Diet, chronicles those changes – the ones that worked and the ones that didn’t – and continues to serve as a journal of my new explorations. I might have lost 100 pounds, but no way am I through changing! It’s too much FUN trying new things to stop now!

I’m honored and excited to be an AIM blogger because I admire and respect each and every one of the other bloggers and appreciate their points of view. I’m looking forward to learning from them and to sharing my own thoughts, all in hopes that this scattershot approach might be of service to others who are either in the maintenance realm or striving to get there. Our stories, our paths, and our struggles might be different, but our “aim” is generally the same: a healthier and more vibrant life. At a smaller (or, at least, not a larger) size!

Debby

I’m Debby, from debby weighs in. When I started my blog, the byline was “thoughts on weight loss and life.” Recently, I decided I knew nothing about weight loss, and changed my byline to “on living a whole and healthy life.”

Like most overweight people, I have a LOOOONG history of mostly being overweight, with many forays into attempted weight loss, some more successful than others, but all of them with one trait in common: I gained back all the weight PLUS some. And so, when I was about 30, I decided that I would never diet again. And I didn’t, for a long, long time. Until one day in 2005, shortly after my 50th birthday, a friend asked me to go to Weight Watchers with her.

At first I turned her down, and said, “But we can be accountable to each other.” After a miserable two weeks of starving myself, I realized I needed a little help, and agreed to go. But this time was different. This time I knew it had to be for the rest of my life.

This time I had the help and support of many friends. I sought out women at work who just lived a healthy lifestyle, and quizzed them on what they ate. I read everything I could find about maintaining weight loss. I read science journals and the latest research, and when I hit a little snag, I hired a personal trainer, who taught me more about eating healthy whole foods than she did about exercise (and she taught me a LOT about exercise!)

It took about two years to lose 100 pounds, and it was only then that I discovered the world of blogging! There was Lynn, in People magazine, and the little box at the bottom of the page said to check out Lynn’s blog on the internet. A whole new world of friends opened up to me.

Since then, maintenance has definitely been an adventure, and these four women have been constant traveling companions. As everyone eventually does, I had a couple of years that were extra stressful, and I regained 25 pounds. It only took two years for me to figure out how to start losing weight again(!) and that is where I am in my journey now. I never stopped working on living a whole and healthy life. And now I have added “aging gracefully” to that work. Its an adventure, that’s for sure!
Lynn

I’m Lynn and I blog at Lynn’s Weigh. When I began this last trek down the scale in 2005, no one but my doctor and I knew what I weighed. Three hundred pounds sounded intangible and scary. But I grew tired of that albatross and so I launched my first website, Lynn’s Weight-Loss Journey, complete with numbers and photos, and immediately I felt lighter. My weight was no longer a secret. It was, and still is, what it is: a number. It’s not who I am.

Like my AIM partners, I realized this last time IS the last time because I approached weight loss differently. I finally understood that if I wanted a permanent change in my body, I had to make a permanent change in my attitude. Head before body. And no celebratory Dairy Queen blizzards once I met goal!

On Lynn’s Weigh, I write about life as a nearly 50-year-old mother to four grown children, grandmother to three (almost 4!) grandchildren, writer, foodie, and exerciser, all through the lens of a person maintaining a 150-plus weight loss. There are more than 1 billion websites out there, but our little AIM consortium is just what the ‘net needs.

Adventures in Baking

Well, I’ve been at it again. I was trying to clean house, and I ran across a cookbook I had gotten at the thrift store. A book with a new dessert recipe for every day of the year ( A Year of Diet Desserts.) Oh saints preserve us. But it actually had very low calorie recipes in it. It was written in 1987, so has some of the typical cooking that seemed to be popular in that era. Very low fat. A LOT of separating of egg white from yolks, and then whipping the whites and folding them back in. I guess this is to make volume? The author also used minimal sweeteners, and almost exclusively used honey for the sweetener in her recipes.

The first one I tried was a smashing success. It was Perfect Pineapple Sauce. Very simple, and only four ingredients.

• 1 Tbsp cornstarch
• 1/4 cup freshly squeezed orange juice (about 1 orange)
• 2 Tbsp honey
• 1 20 oz can crushed pineapple (in its own juice)

Just combine the first 3 in a pan over medium heat until blended. Add the pineapple and continue to cook until thickened. Only 15 calories per tablespoon.

So far I’ve had it on an english muffin (with just a bit of that yogurt cheese.) Two Yumms up!

And I had it with some cottage cheese and a few walnuts. Also tres delicieux.

A few pages over they had a recipe for “squash pudding.” Now that sounded interesting. And I had WAY too much butternut squash in the fridge. Well, this was one of those recipes where you had to whip the egg whites. Way too much work. And then I realized that it was pretty much substituting squash for pumpkin, and I could kind of follow my pumpkin custard recipe. I varied it a bit, and it is very enjoyable. And VERY low cal. Check out the recipe for Roasted Butternut Squash Pudding here.

If you recall, I bought pre-sliced apples and blueberries for the quilt show reception, and then never put them out. What to do, what to do? Well, I made a batch of apple blueberry baked oatmeal. Very yumm. This is a pared down baked oatmeal, very low fat, but full of fruit. Click here to see my Bare Bones Baked Oatmeal recipe.

I still had some blueberries, so I made another batch of my Bare Bones Blueberry Scones. I likee!

And lastly, I am very sorry I do not have a picture of this. Because it was SOOOOOO good. I had a hankering for some lasagna. It started with that yogurt that turned into ricotta. And then I ended up not putting that yogurt ricotta into it. Anyway, it was a single serving, and you know how much I like that. I weighed out half a portion of whole wheat lasagna noodles (which turned out to be one piece,) and broke it into 4 pieces. I had one serving of my Darn Good Spaghetti Sauce in the freezer. I measured out 1/4 cup of cottage cheese, and I had one low fat mozzarella cheese stick left in the fridge. And then I took a zucchini and sliced it long-ways (throwing away the core with the seeds.) I found a single serving pyrex bowl, and I just layered all those ingredients (yes, just the dry lasagna noodle,) and topped with the mozzarella cheese stick that I had grated. Covered with foil, and baked at 350 for about 45 minutes. It was a big serving. I could probably have called it two servings, but I ate the whole thing. About 385 most worthy calories.

Don’t worry. I did not eat all these things in one day. All the baked goods are portioned out and are in the freezer for easy convenient breakfasts.

Have a Happy and Healthy Christmas!

What are YOU doing for Thanksgiving this year?

Jill calls the holiday season–Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas–the Trifecta of Diet Doom! Check out her description of it–writing perfection!  It can seem like that. We can be tempted to just give up and indulge this time of year.

But with just a substitution or two, you can turn your Thanksgiving feast into something just as delicious, but a whole lot healthier. Here are two of my favorite “special” vegetable recipes from the past year.

First up is a green bean recipe that will put that old green bean casserole recipe to shame. I cannot tell a lie. I had nothing to do with this recipe. It is Balsamic Glazed Green Beans and Pearl Onions. A most worthy side dish at only 53 calories per serving!

Next is one of my all-time favorite “comfort food” recipes. This idea for this recipe originally came in my health insurance newsletter–so it has to be healthy, right? It is Cauliflower Potato Bake. Somewhat reminiscent of Potatoes au Gratin. Definitely healthified, at only 66 calories per serving. I actually think this dish is perfect paired with a baked ham. Because everybody knows you have to have MASHED potatoes with turkey, right? Tada! I give you Mashed Cauliflower. Don’t turn your nose up at it until you try it (Cammy, you’re excused.) It only took me two years of hearing about mashed cauliflower before I would try it! And now its one of my favorite veggies! And I felt especially vindicated when I heard some of the top chefs on The Food Network mentioning ‘cauliflower mash.’ Its so good and creamy that you don’t even need gravy. (But at only 40 calories per serving, you can afford a little gravy on top!)

What are your favorite healthified Thanksgiving recipes?  Or do you just indulge for the day?  I think I am still a bit of a volume eater, so I like to have a few healthy choices and have bigger servings.

 

A Good Week

It was a pretty good week.  I ate too much.  What else is new?  Hopefully making up for it this coming week.  I spent four days in the Bay Area this week.  First day I drove straight from my house all the way to Pacific Grove.  That is a long drive.  Between the drive and not drinking enough, I reaffirmed that those two factors work together to make me feel like crap.

I had a lot of fun shopping in Pacific Grove.  Of course, they have a quilt shop that I love going to, a good yarn shop, and lots of other interesting little shops.  I didn’t really buy much.  Headed back to my hotel headquarters in Milpitas (that was the most centrally located place for all the places I wanted to visit.)  I had brought food with me for lunch, so after checking into the hotel, I treated myself to dinner at Chili’s.  Because I wanted some chips…  To go along with the chips, I chose a salad from their ‘healthy’ menu, and it was so pretty when it came, I took a picture of it.  Quite tasty.  Even the salad dressing seemed light.

Next day was a “day with Mom.”  I try to find nice places to walk every day, and this is Niles Creek, right next to where my mom lives.  That heron and duck never stopped preening their feathers the whole time I was down there.

And all these Canadian geese seemed to really enjoy the shallow water and the rocks.

Day with Mom went well.  I think I ate too much that day too…  Oh, she took me to a grocery story called Sunflowers Farmers Market–reminded me of Sprouts–and that was a lot of fun.  They have stuff in the bins, which I like, because its a lot cheaper than packaged stuff, and I found some chia seeds at a decent price.

And then the next day–A VISIT WITH SHELLEY!!!  Its so fun that Shelley and I have been able to meet more than usual due to our California/Texas connection.  Last time we got together, I started Shelley out knitting, and she has taken off like wildfire, as most of you know.  So this day we visited a few yarn shops in Santa Cruz (where she is visiting her BF) and then we had lunch at an excellent Bakery, which was conveniently located right next to one of the yarn shops.  They served lunch on an outdoor patio area, and we just sat and talked and knit and talked and ate a little, and then knit some more.  It was so fun, and so relaxing.  It was one of those lovely days with the sun shining brightly and a cool breeze blowing.  The perfect day to get a sunburn… oh well, once every 10 years or so I do that.

And then it was time for dinner, so we found a frozen yogurt shop!  I swear, between the two of us it was like we had a froyo GPS!

Friday morning I headed home, with a side trip to check out my dad’s house to see how repairs are coming along there.  Its almost ready to put on the market.  Worrying about this is stressful to me.  I’m blaming my overeating on that, and hoping that once its sold and the estate is settled, I will be able to get a few pounds off…

Stopped in Stockton to eat lunch and to shop at Costco for Vicky.  I do some grocery shopping for her sometimes.  Its actually hard work shopping for someone else.  And then on to the gym, where I did not work out, but I worked for Vicky for a couple of hours.  THAT was a long day!

When I got home those Newton shoes that I had ordered were waiting for me.  Can I just say that I feel like a grade school crossing guard wearing them?  Those things are BRIGHT!  But, they fit just right.  The soles are definitely different than my Saucony’s, so I am still getting used to walking in them. But I think I like them.

Saturday was a slugfest.  Shelley had kindly brought along Season Five of Doc Martin (everybody knows about this show, right?) for me to borrow.  I sat and watched all 8 episodes in one day! Most of the day the doggies stayed in my lap,  but for a while I was organizing some thread, and this was the scene:

Bess keeping a close watch from her perch on the couch.

And Sophie, as always, as close as she can possibly get without breaking the rules… you can see Monk across the room in ‘his’ chair.

Sometimes I think about “how did I ever do this (get the weight off?)”  I think about all the stuff I used to eat that I no longer consider healthy.  One of those things is the sugar free chocolate COOK AND SERVE pudding.  I really used to like that stuff.  So I decided to make some when I got home.  And I noticed the microwave directions on the box.  YAY!  Cooking the pudding was a pain in the butt because the milk would always stick to the pan.  Microwaving it was slick, just like when I make my homemade yogurt in the microwave.  And it is still tasty, and at least it is like eating 1/2 cup of milk.

I’ve got to end this right now, because I HAVE to get out for at least a little walk with Noah tonight!