Well, its always interesting to take a little bloggy break. It makes you think about why you are blogging, why you read so darn many other blogs, and what is the point anyway. Of course, you don’t have to take a break to think about these things. Miz wrote a great post a bit ago reminding us to think about why we blog, and what our ‘brand’ is. I’m afraid I don’t have a brand. My posts seem to run a wide gamut depending on my mood, the amount of time I have, and what’s happening in my life and/or the blog world at the time. Sometimes I just blather on about the events of the day. Lots of time I can’t help but talk a lot about food–I love it. Then of course, the doggie news and flower/nature shots slip in once in a while. Sometimes I post every single day. And then other times, even though I am home, I just don’t seem to have anything to say, or the energy to say it.
So there you go. I don’t have a brand. If I had to name one reason I blog, it is the hope that I might encourage another person struggling with a large amount of weight to lose. It sometimes seems a miracle to me that I have been able to keep 100 pounds off, and I’d like to think I’ve learned a bit about what it takes to lose weight and keep it off, and I’d like to share that with others. For sure, I haven’t figured everything out yet. But I do keep trying to learn and to finesse my approach to food and exercise. Today I was talking to a friend who is always trying to lose weight, and she said ‘I’m so tired of trying.’ And I agreed with her that some days I feel like that too. But then I said that I remember the alternative–either someone writes about their physical struggles with being overweight, or I see someone walking very slowly and painfully who is probably close to what I used to weigh. And I remember the pain I lived with every day. I remember that I couldn’t even get comfortable sitting in a comfortable chair. I remember every step being painful, and how the small of my back would burn when I had to stand for too long at work. I remember how I looked forward to the time when I could use one of those stupid riding carts to get around in. I remember the dread of knowing that I was going to die young. And then I’m not so tired of trying anymore.
So along those lines, I am still experimenting with the ‘intuitive eating.’ Meaning for me, I am not writing down what I eat, I am trying to ‘honor my health’ (choose healthy foods 90% of the time) and I am paying attention to when I am really hungry, and trying not to eat just for the pleasure of it. Although if I do want to eat for the pleasure of it, I will allow myself to do that sometimes, but I don’t eat to feeling stuffed. I still have a very good idea of how many calories I am consuming, because I have counted for so very long. And it makes me feel comfortable to add up what I’ve eaten to make sure its within what seems reasonable (which is approximately 1300-1800.) (I actually bought the intuitive eating book so I would know a little more about what I was talking about. That’s where the phrase ‘honoring my health’ came from.)
Along with all that, I am getting a reasonable amount of exercise in most days. Two walks a day with Noah, and the gym for weights workouts (sometimes circuit training) 2-3 times per week. In general, on the days I don’t go to the gym, my walks with Noah are longer, and running is included if the old body feels up to it.
And it seems to be working. My weight fluctuates between 154.6 and 157.6. This morning it was 155.6. And that was after spending two days with my BF and eating a little out of the ordinary. We ate out a bit, and enjoyed dessert a bit. But she is watching her weight too, so when we had lunch out, we just had a snack for dinner. I was actually surprised that my weight was that low this morning.
It has been raining non-stop here for two days. And still the walks with Noah go on. Yesterday I was walking him in the rain, and I realized that I was actually doing this for myself. That I was the one who actually liked walking even if it was raining. Noah didn’t look so thrilled about walking in the rain.