One Good Day

Honestly, for the past few days, I’ve been thinking that I was doomed.  Doomed to gain all my weight back, I mean.  Just what I feared from the very start–that it would all disappear, and I would go back to the way (weight) I was before, just like in the movie “Awakenings.”  And I’ve been trying to figure out what to say about it.

Make no mistake about it.  I have been in a gaining trend.  And this past weekend when I was out of town, I was very unhappy with my image in the mirror.  I know.  All that stuff I’ve said about accepting my body image…  I’ve had some stressful stuff to deal with the past two weeks, and there were a couple of times I COULDN’T STOP EATING.  Believe it or not,  the stress was more about other people and things that were out of my control, instead of the anxiety that used to make me overeat.  Even when I wasn’t stressed, I was just eating a little too much.

So I don’t know what the future holds, but I do know I had one good day today.  I wrote down my four meals and one snack and stuck right to them.  (Ha–I should probably eat my last snack and go immediately to bed so the spell won’t be broken!)  I chose low calorie, nutrient dense foods so I wouldn’t get too hungry between meals.  And I even thought a little bit about ‘its okay to be hungry.’  And tonight when I was working on a new experimental low calorie recipe for dinner just because that’s what I wanted to eat, I thought, well, this isn’t the behavior of a person who has given up.  So we’ll see.

That recipe I was making?  Turned out pretty darn good!  I was inspired by Helen’s cauliflower recipe and the fact that I had a head of cauliflower in the refrigerator.  I didn’t have any of the other ingredients in her recipe though, so I tried something different.  Mexican Cauliflower Pork Casserole.  Quite yummy!  And a big serving, and when I plugged the ingredients into caloriecount, I was very happy with the stats on it.

(Honestly, sometimes I think a lot of my food pictures look like cat food, but you’ll have to take my word for it–they taste good!)

A few other good food ideas from the past week:

Pina Colada Yogurt.  Just a serving of my homemade yogurt with a teaspoon of unsweetened coconut and a little coconut extract, topped with some crushed pineapple and a sprinkle of granola.

I am in love with turkey burgers.  And honestly, I like them just as much without the bun, plus, they’re a whole lot less messy to eat.

Okay, this one veers into processed food a bit, but it sure was a tasty combo.  A serving of strawberries with a spray of reddi whip light on top, paired with a caramel rice cake (50 calories.)  Yumm yumm.

I am fascinated with the little froggies that appear at my front door.  This little guy has perched up on the door knob for the past two days.  How did he get here all by himself, and why does he like it up there?  I worry about him.

And finally, an update on the sheep rug.  I was very pleased when I took it off the frame to take these photos.  It looks better from a distance than I thought.  Still a lot to do, but I am making steady progress now.  Of course, rug camp is in 2 1/2 weeks, so I don’t think I’ll finish it.

Close-ups.  I dyed some of the wool for the grass myself, so I am very happy about how that turned out.  I used some angora sweaters, so that adds a neat texture to it.  (Rugs are traditionally hooked with plain wool.)

So that’s about it for tonight.  I have some busy, packed, slightly stressful days ahead.  I am glad I have some food pre-cooked for ready-to-eat meals.

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11 thoughts on “One Good Day

  1. I’m so sorry for your stresses, Debby! I hope things level out for you soon!

    Your rug is beautiful. I so envy your vision and your talent!

  2. I adore that rug! You are so good with color!

    I understand that feeling of instant doom when it comes to weight regain. I guess the good thing is that it keeps us on our toes? Bah. It’s a big pain to worry about. And then to have other stressors on top, well, that sure can do a number on you, mentally. I’m glad you had a good food day – you’ll get this back, I know it.

  3. Hi Debby! Sorry to hear that you’re going through a stressful time. 😦 I hear ya on those feelings. I’ve regained, too…too much going on–even when it’s mostly good stuff–can still be too much and can cause me to lose focus on the healthy stuff. I like your idea of “one good day,” though.

    And the sheep rug is turning out beautiful! 🙂 I love the color variations.

  4. This is probably a first for me, but I’m actually missing my own kitchen. Haven’t had a turkey burger since I left home almost two weeks ago. It’s become a staple in my food plan and my mouth watered when I saw yours. Bill’s not fond of them, so had just decided to do without on the trip. Maybe not!! And I love the cauliflower recipe – will definitely try that one when I get home. Since I’m not eating much dairy, I’ll try yours with the less cheese.

    As for the weight struggles, you’re right! They’ll always be a part of our lives. There will be easier times and there will be times of great struggle. One thing’s for sure – there will never be a time with NO struggle. But you don’t want to go back. I’ve personally seen how much you enjoy being outside and how much fun we had on that trail in the Smokies looking at the flowers and the waterfall. You don’t want to go back to the days when that hike would’ve been impossible.

    Do the next right thing. Just focus on that. Make one good day become two good days. Then three, four, etc. Times of great stress are the most difficult. It took me two years to get my mojo back after my FIL died and the food involved with that derailed me. I don’t want that to happen to any of my friends. Hang in there, friend! I”ll try to help any way I can.

  5. One good day at a time strung together equals being back on track. Someone commented to me the other day about “Fake It ‘Till You Make It’ and I guess we all have to do that sometimes.

    You are so talented Debby! I am envious of your rug and quilting and other crafty skills!

  6. I’ve been in a similar muddle Debbie but am starting to figure stuff out. I have learned to be patient with muddles because they often provide great insight 🙂

    I am intrigued by the little frog, too. Hope he made it to where ever it is he needs to be!

  7. I would say this post and your subsequent eats show that you are *not* doomed and *not* giving up. Sometimes the struggles are deeper and longer than at other times. It seems that when maintaining (or even losing, really) there is that line that you cross between being accepting and complacent. I think with complacency comes weight gain. Accepting doesn’t mean you stop trying, but just accepting that where you are right this minute is okay. Sure, it may not be quite where you want to be, but it is not a reflection on the person you are.

  8. Your rug is beautiful. It almost makes me want to be a hooker. I’m so obsessive about my quilting I’m sure I would get the same way about hooking… can’t afford that right now : )

  9. I seem to be learning to keep it simple. quality. really satifying visually and texturally. if I run across something that really satisfies me so that I don’t want to obsess on something else , then I stick with it. Like salads with just arugala, a sprinkle of parm cheese, a few bits of tomato, BLACKBERRIES of all things, and balsalmic vinagarette. throw in some kind of protein -even a piece of cheese toast and I’m really satisfied. Travel, being away from home and your dogbabies and routine and then seeing how others lives might have shook you up a bit. Plus being with so many other people and maybe now your are a bit lonely?

    Ah what do I know? :Laptop philospher.

    I think the little froggie feels very safe in that spot. way up high. nothing can get him . it’s very cool or very warm..just right. He likes the isolation and he likes to be able to see everything. Thanks for sharing that little guy. He reminds me of me..

  10. Weight slide. I feel shallow saying this, but to me that is the worst feeling in the world. A couple of pounds at a time. And they ratchet in and just stay. I hate it! RRAAaaar! (That’s how I shout my frustration on line.) I empathize. I’m up from post-loss low. (I’ll tell you the pounds, if you want, but this is your blog and it’s about you, not me.) The good thing, I think: you aren’t in denial (and neither am I). You’re owning the pounds, and then you’re digging in your heels and returning to plan. (Double ditto.) It’s all you can do and you are doing it. YOU ARE DOING IT! (I’m shouting at me too, you understand.) Exercise is also important. Have you fully reclaimed that too? Dig, girl, dig. I’m with you! I’m digging with you. I know the depressing odds, the science, and yet I’m digging in. Sometimes I briefly reframe it as “Well, I’m still down XX pounds from highest established weight.” But I know it’s more important to just say RAAaaar! and dig in. It’s best not to frame it at all. So what if it is up from the bottom and so what if it’s down from the top: it’s just today’s reality and reality (especially at a lowered body weight that isn’t one’s lowest lowered body weight) is stinking hard some days. Now the flip side: Reality can also be joyful. It can be both hard and joyful. Denial, on the other hand, is only a temporary respite from the hard part of reality, and it never ends in joy.

    Hug.

    Hugs are empathy. They can be sad or joyful.

    Here’s another, so you’ll have both: Hug.

    Now, about that rug. How gorgeous that is turning out!! The colors, oh my. The texture on the horns (one of which you had to flip). I just love it. And the varigations in the grass. Just stunning. You are such a gifted artist.

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