The Garden…and Other Things I Haven’t Written About

This morning I spent about 3 hours working in the garden. And I thought about taking pictures, but it just seemed like the garden is in that in-between stage when there’s nothing particularly interesting to show. Hopefully, in a few weeks, my work will be rewarded with lots of pretty flowers to share with you.

But while I worked, I thought about all the things I HAVEN’T written about lately. And how, just like the garden, even though I haven’t written about those things, it doesn’t mean the work is not being done.

Just because I haven’t written much about weight loss/maintenance DOESN’T MEAN I AM FAT. GIVE ME A BREAK. Maybe I have already said everything I could possibly think to say about the subject. Maybe I am busy living my life, and going to the computer to repeat my thoughts about what is necessary to lose and maintain weight has been usurped by much more interesting creative impulses.

Every day of my life I work on maintaining my weight loss. Some days it seems absolutely effortless. And some days it seems like a full time job. When I mention to people that I used to weigh a lot more, and we’re discussing keeping the weight off, I almost always say the same thing–“Its hard work.”

Just because I am not writing about food or recipes or low-cal cooking DOESN’T mean I have gone off the rails. FAR FROM IT. I’ve tried some really excellent new recipes lately. They were other people’s recipes, and they were tasty and healthy and low calorie. I didn’t even have to adjust them. They’re all out there on the web. I just didn’t feel the need to share them. And sometimes food tastes better than it looks. That’s the case with my latest try.

Just because I haven’t mentioned the gym lately, doesn’t mean I sit for hours in my Lazy Boy in front of the boob tube. How many times and in how many different ways can I say “I went to the gym. I did my weights workouts. The same exercises at the same weights. I got on the exercise bike, and I rode for the same distance in the same amount of minutes.” And on the other days, “I took Noah for a walk, and I came home and did my PT exercises.” And in case anybody’s wondering–yes, I am in an exercise rut. Its a rut I like very much. Which means that I will keep exercising consistently. Which is one of the most important factors in weight loss maintenance.

Oh, and one more thing. Just because I do not post pictures of myself that often, it does not mean I have gained a ton of weight and am embarrassed by my appearance. I live alone. My arms are short. You do the math.

Maybe, just maybe, if I am ever really healed of the chronic condition of WEIGHT, there will be no more need to write ad nauseam about the daily vagaries of my LIFE WITH FOOD.

I love you guys and I love blogging. I love the comments and “conversations” we have on this blog and some of my other friends’ blogs.

But sometimes the drama and the judgmental attitudes expressed by other bloggers just gets to me. Their opinions are arrogant and mean-spirited, and they are saying those things about people they don’t even really know. If you want to write about your own shortcomings, that’s fine. But don’t drag all the rest of us in with your irresponsible blanket statements.




22 thoughts on “The Garden…and Other Things I Haven’t Written About

  1. Debbie,
    I don’t tend to read other people’s comments and it appears from your post that I missed somebody’s misdirected unhappiness that came your way. No matter what anyone says or posts, we each have our own struggle, and bringing others down when we are having “a day without sunshine” is, as you said, mean spirited. If you posted your picture daily, somebody out there is going to give you grief. Look up, smile, God loves YOU ! And at what ever weight you are at! He wants us healthy, but our Spiritual Health is the most important part of us. Keep on being YOU, nobody else can do it!
    With true respect for someone who has been willing to put herself “out there” and be real about having a weight problem,
    May God Bless you beyond your imaginations,

    • Hi Luann, Thanks so much for such a kind comment. There was no comment directed at me (directly.) As a “big sister” I tend to be protective of others who have been hurt.

  2. Agree with Luann. I read YOU to know YOU. Don’t read comments. Am struggling lately with my glucose levels and doing that “slipping” and kidding myself about what I’m doing. There, I said it. Now it’s real. Back on track. Thanks for the chance to vocalize it.

  3. Luann’s comment is a perfect verbalization of my thoughts. I am so grateful I found you and the other “Adventurers”. If you don’t have a current post, you have a huge history of posts to refer to time and time again. I am working my way forward through your old posts, trying to find the will to take my own journey to a healthier life. Thank you for sharing your own journey.

  4. Debbie, I read your column regularly, and I’m rooting for you! Blogs are great to read, very inspirational, but the cyber bullying that sometimes appears needs to stop. We all need to disregard those mean comments.
    Dieting is hard, but it is finite. Maintenance is forever, therefore it is a constant, ongoing struggle. One lesson I learned while dieting was that I actually lost weight more consistently when I occasionally splurged a little. It confused my metabolism. So I want to splurge once in a while now, too.
    Hang in there. I love your blog and feel like you are my cyber friend.

  5. So sorry to hear you had some bad comments! No one deserves that. I feel your blog is very inspiring. I know how hard it is to lose weight and maintain it! (I’m right now in the losing phase). Especially for us women that are older. Don’t listen to those grouchy people!

  6. I love that you are telling it like it is! Reality, when you’re doing what you’re supposed to be doing, can get a little – well, not boring, but routine. And I’m proud of you for doing what needs to be done in order to live and feel the way you want. I loved what you wrote about your exercise rut – finding what you like and doing it over and over is awesome!

    I’ve come across certain blogs who either denigrate any other way but their own as THE way to lose/maintain weight; and I’ve also come across a recent post where the author sweepingly said that everyone who started out blogging/losing weight with her has gotten fat. Not so for both of these instances; their sweeping generalizations are ridiculous, and a big reason why I rarely read them.

  7. Hello Debby
    On this beautiful sunny day, I’m looking forward to upcoming pictures of your garden! I also have found your blog inspiring.

    Enjoy the rest of your day.

  8. Peeping in… I was just wondering about those Lily of the Valleys and if they were blooming yet LOL!

  9. Debby, you are kind-hearted, obviously. I love to see that a “normal” life exists after weight loss. I know you have to work at it, routine work is still work, and it all inspires me. And reassures me which may be more important. Here is Debby whom I have a lot in common with and she lost a lot of weight and has kept if off and her life goes on and seems real and enjoyable. Lori H used a good word, “authentic”.

  10. My first thought on reading this post was, “Whoa! What happened?!?” Followed by a read through the comments. I’m glad you weren’t the receiver of the negative…and am sorry to hear that another blogger received comments that would cause you to respond strongly. You get an “amen!” from me! I don’t have maintenance down perfectly…if so, I’d be closer to the health I was a few years ago…but that doesn’t mean I’ve completely thrown in the towel, either. I am so grateful for blogs like yours and the other Adventurers…not only the joy of feeling connected to friends I’ve made online and in person, but it helps normalize that it does take focus and work, that consistency in better habits will pay off eventually. I’m just not feeling as compelled to write about it on my blog as frequently, I guess. My own blogging seems to be the ball sacrificed to keep my others in the air at this point in my life.

  11. It never popped up in my mind that you were doing other things than the things you wrote. I don’t write much about my weight loss but that doesn’t mean I’m not working on it.

    I often say that people think they can say or write everything on the internet. It’s so easy being mean when you are safe behind your laptop. Most of them wouldn’t dare to say mean things when they are face to face. I always say: if you don’t have something nice to say, then say nothing.

    As for the overexercisers/weight lossers that know better than the rest: I don’t read their blogs. I don’t read blogs of runners that run a marathon every month. I read the blog of runners that are the same as me. I only read the blogs of real people so if you get a comment from me, you know you are in that group of people 🙂

  12. Your post made me laugh (at myself.) How wise of you–just don’t read those blogs! And I am very complimented that you read my blog, Fran.

  13. I understand where you’re coming from. I have stopped reading the “meanies,” and some of them got a taste of their own medicine last year and seem to have disappeared. But there are always a few around. And then there are the “holier than thou types.” Oh well, what can you do about those folks. They’re prisoners of their own reality.

    I have always subscribed to the idea that healthy living/weight loss bloggers are primarily here to help themselves and others get healthy or “healthier.” There’s no ‘one way’ to do it, and I find myself changing things up from time to time, and that’s okay! I also sometimes read blogs unrelated to weight loss and fitness, such as decorating blogs and fashion and beauty blogs. As a result, I did finally learn how to apply my foundation, after more than 50 years of trying, thanks to another blogger (lol)! I guess I just have a lot to learn, but getting blasted or preached at doesn’t help. You’re right on, Debby! Have a great day!

  14. Ha ha, loved this post. I think many many of us could have written the exact same thoughts. I might not be at maintenance yet, but the same idea applies to the ongoing weight loss journey. I don’t know why it is that people assume the worst, and forget that we have a “real” life to live, and some days we are just busy livin’ it instead of blogging about it. Doesn’t mean I’m feet up into a vat of mac n cheese… just that I’ve about said all I have to say for now, and am off having adventures.
    And then, some days I am even bored by my own struggles… same ole, same ole, with the same ole, same ole solutions. 😉

    I think that’s sweet of you to feel protective of your sister bloggers… says a lot about your good heart.

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